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You're not alone.

There's a powerful movement sweeping the globe: people are quitting "fapping," also known as masturbation, and/or pornography as it relates to fapping. As with any habit or addiction, stopping fapping takes time, patience, and sometimes trial and error.


Here's a guide on how to resist urges, stop fapping, and take your power back. 

Step 1: Identify the purpose of the mission

What's your reason for stopping fapping? Is it for your emotional or sexual health? A relationship? Or are you doing it for religious or ethical reasons? Maybe you're just curious to try it and see what happens. No matter what your reason is, spend a bit of time being clear about your underlying motivation to pursue this challenge. Think about what your habit is costing you in time, energy, or relationships. How would quitting porn or masturbation improve aspects of your life? Having a strong reason "why" will support you through difficult times. Remind yourself of this purpose regularly to stay motivated and on track.

Step 2: Investigate your triggers

Habits are ingrained in us because of triggers that our brains associate with a given behavior. To break a habit, you need to rewire your brain to break the trigger-behavior relationship. If you can eliminate these triggers, or begin to associate them with a replacement behavior, you disrupt the cycle and take back your power. Keep track of every time you feel an urge. What triggered you right before the urge? This will help you uncover the triggers leading to your addiction.

Step 3: Master your environment

Devise a plan for how you'll attack when triggers arise. And, as much as possible, avoid triggers that can compromise your mission. Set yourself up for success by having alternative coping mechanisms in place for when temptation hits. Consider taking up a new skill that interests and excites you, and turn to that skill whenever you feel the urge to seek out porn or masturbation. Get ideas for ways to distract yourself when temptation hits. You can also reward yourself with something you enjoy, like a favorite show or song, that you only allow yourself when that trigger strikes. Try to understand the root cause of this trigger and whether it's a symptom of something deeper, like low self-esteem. Seek out resources that can help you process these feelings. Finally, remind yourself of your reasons from Step 1 every day and every time you're triggered.

Step 4: Monitor your progress

Seeing your progress can be tremendously motivating, especially when you're facing resistance. Be sure to track how you're doing. Every time you ward off a trigger, tally it. Soon you'll have a running count of all the fapping you didn't do. Seeing those tally marks can be incredibly rewarding. If you slip up, don't beat yourself up. Failure is part of the process. Learn from failure by reflecting on what the circumstances were. Use this new intel to your advantage by trying out new strategies. Think about whether your goal was realistic to begin with, or if you need to modify your goal so that it's more incremental.

Step 5: Call for backup

There's no need for you to go it alone. Having a strong support system can get you through temptations and setbacks. Asking for help is not weakness. It's smart. It's strategic. Almost every superhero has a sidekick, and you should seek out yours to help you through, watch your back, and hold you accountable. Find a community of people online, such as the NoFap community and subreddit forum,  that understand what you're going through and who can make recommendations for ways to stay motivated. Create external accountability by getting an accountability partner to check in with regularly so that you stay on track.

Need ideas for how to distract yourself? Read our article on 14 Ways to Distract Yourself From Temptation.




Use this printable worksheet to:

  • identify what's triggering your habit

  • uncover trends and themes in your behavior

  • begin to address the root cause

Ultimately, by tracking your triggers, you can find replacements for your habit and break it for good.

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